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What is the Best Way to Get Divorced?

Do I get a Lawyer? A Mediator? Should I do it by Myself? By Vivian L. Holley, JD, MA, CFLS, MFT The “best way” to divorce is to find a process which results in peace for yourself and your family – your children and your about-to-be former spouse! Looking back over 36 years of  experience Read More

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Should I Negotiate My Own Settlement?

By Vivian L. Holley, JD, MA, CFLS, MFT Suppose you are Party 1 and your spouse Party 2 in the graphic below.  You would be negotiating your settlement directly with your spouse, perhaps over the kitchen table.  Maybe your marriage counselor will help you.  It is the least expensive method for working out your settlement.  Read More

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Should I Use A Mediator?

By Vivian L. Holley, JD, MA, CFLS, MFT Yes, if you feel you would like the guidance of a professional to assist you as you and your spouse make the decisions involving you property, assets, debts and children.  Notice in the graphic below that you are still in direct communication with your spouse, but the Read More

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Should I Hire a Collaborative Attorney?

What if I Want to Have an Attorney Help Me in a Collaborative Setting? By Vivian L. Holley, JD, MA, CFLS, MFT If you feel you need to engage an attorney so you will feel “safer” in the negotiation, perhaps because you are not sure your spouse will listen to you and your position, but Read More

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Should I Hire a Traditional Divorce Attorney?

Using the Traditional Adversary System? Because Parties Just Cannot Agree on Anything, Ever. By Vivian L. Holley, JD, MA, CFLS, MFT Sometimes the trust has broken down so badly that lawyers need to be hired to go through the courts to resolve the disputes.  This is usually the case when there has been physical violence Read More

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40 + Types of Parents Making up Today’s Modern Families

By Vivian L. Holley, JD, MA, CFLS, MFT For many years I have been interested in all the variations of parents we can have, and I started writing and speaking about this in the early 1990’s. Below is an outline of the “40+ Different Types of Parents Making up Today’s Family” written in 2000 by Read More